LaCroix and Nicholas graciously allow Sony/Tristar to THINK they are owned by that company. We, however, know better--- those vampires own themselves! (God knows they prove it to me every time I try to write something..)

Dr. Vanderwaal is that exorcist guy from the episode: Sons of Belial. No spoilers though.

Oh yeah-- and the CotK website can have all my stuff too. (Don't cry, Lisa H.--- this too shall pass! Besides, your keyboard isn't waterproof.) <G>

Flames will be pasted on my front door to scare the willies out o' the little tykes-- so watch yer tongue. (Vampires and Cacti and Bovines-- Oh my!)

This is a companion piece to 'Nightmare On Gateway Street. Lane. Whatever!'. However, it can be read alone. Preferably in a dark, scary room to get in the Halloween mood. Even better would be a room so dark you can't read this print. Spare yourself the agony.

{{ }} denotes noises in the background.

<Dial. Dial.>
[Impatient Wait] What is taking him so long? If that infernal answering machine of his...!

"Moo."

Good gods, that was even worse than his other recordings.
"I beg your pardon?"
"{{Hey! Give me that!... ... darn it all...}} Hello?"
"... Nicholas?"
"uh.. LaCroix?"
"Yes. Nicholas, I--"
"LaCroix, I'm.. uh...kinda busy just now. Can whatever it is wait until tommorrow night?"
"My, my we are in a--"
"Look, I'm-- {{Hey! Don't touch that!}}-- I'm *really* indisposed tonight."
<Crash!> [Old Brabantian sayings best left to the imagination] {{Well, that just tears it, doesn't it! Who's going to clean this up?}} {{Moo? moo? Mwoo?}}"

"Nicholas?"
<scrunching of footsteps on newsprint> "Right here."
"It's them again, isn't it."
"Father?"
"The cows, Nicholas. Your annual visitors from the Pasture Beyond."
"Uh... yeah."
"Really, Nicholas. The situations you allow yourelf to get into. You don't see *me* being corraled up by a herd of angsty bovines every 365th night, do you?"
"Well... no. But then I don't get to--"
"And you won't. Now about why I ca--" <whine, sniff, sniff>
"LaCroix?"
"Excuse me a moment." <boot!> <whimper>
"LaCroix? ...Father, are you alright? It's not Divia's birthday anniversary or something, is it?" {{Moo?}} {{None of your business! And this is a private conversation!}} "Sorry about that. It sounded for a minute like.."
<icy tone> "*Yes*?"
"Nuthin."
"I'm *fine*, Nicholas." Oh, yes. Eveything was just *peachy*. "I... err.. just called to wish you a Happy All Hallows Eve."
"Oh. Thanks."
"Goodbye."
"Bye." {{Moo. moo. Moo. Mwoo.}} {{Oh, shut up!}}
<click>

Drat.
Now how was he going to get ahold of Dr. Vaderwaal's new number? If only the self-avowed excorist had listed in the telephone pages or at least with Information.

Stupid mortals.

<Whine! Pant Pant. Snuffle... Sniff.> "hoOOWL!"
"Silence!"
>whimper...>

By the Gods!
He had once told his son that 'man's best friends' were only for breakfast--- and then only at the worst of times. Unfortunately, over his 2000-yrs those 'worst of times' seemed to have been stacking up considerably. It was all Nicholas' fault of course... (wouldn't *that* knowledge please his guilt-craving son!). Ever since his growing enrapturement with mortality Nicholas had been forcing him into extreme situations to keep up. Why-- just that flaming stake incident alone had caused him to all but deplete the stray dog populace of Toronto.

Maybe he should send the city a bill for his services.
He could use the funds to pay for the excorism.

Damnation. They were doing it again. Staring at him.
It was being trapped in one of those Mirror Mazes with his angst-ridden son--- surrounded on all sides by pair upon pair of large, soul-stricken eyes dewy with excessive moisture.

How annoying.

<whine, pant pant, wag, whine, pant, wag, whine, sniff sniff, whine, pidd-->

"*Don't* even **think** about it. It's your own fault you didn't all go before you ca... and *That* had better not be what I think it is! <whimper.. whimper...>
"Aw-ooooooOOOO!"

Grins, :)=

Kyer, Loyal Squirette to the Knight de Brabant; Knight de Soir, Cousin to the Knight, One of The Hungry, Le Miz, Immortal Beloved (yet flexible), Queen O' deTypos, Paranoid-Schitzoid Knightie with Multi-Personalities who's having a blast and an angstfest at one and the same time! [email protected]