Gee, this gets tedious... ) I don't own anything of these characters or songs. I don't even own the plot of dirt I'm sitting on.

I mainly wrote these as an excuse to write that if someone notes a *close* similarity of my work with someone else's earlier stuff, please let me know and I will consider yanking mine. Such an occurance would be purely coincidental, but I don't want to upset any fellow filkers.--- Kyer

<set to 'Row, Row, Row Your Boat'>

NICK: "Doomed, Doomed, Doomed to Angst:
I am but a leech!"

LACROIX: "Nicholas, Nicholas, Nicholas, Nicholas--
Life is like a peach."

(Pause)

NICK: "And you must be the worm."

I'm a perky, good cop
Yes, I am!
See, on my name badge--
Vetter's my clan.
When I get all caff'd up,
'Perky', be damned!
Enough with the jokes--ad nauseam!

<grumbling> so my dog was 'Sparky'... so?