It was well after 2.00am when the ever effusive Stephano dropped the tired
CotKers back at the Comfy Cottage.  By and large, they'd all enjoyed
themselves, but it had been a long day and several of them were still
suffering sleep deprevation from their efforts to get to Toronto as quickly
as possible.

Opening the front door, and fumbling for the security system, Kyer yawned
hugely.  "Don't know about you guys, but I'm for bed pronto.  And a very
late breakfast tomorrow sounds in order, doesn't it?"

It's a well known scientific fact that yawns are hugely contagious, and her
only responses from the tired group merely proved this fact beyond any
contradiction.

 Having locked the front door securely, and peered suspiciously at all the
locks to be sure it really and truly was well and properly secured (Hey, it
may be the wee small hours, but it's still War time....!), Kyer turned
towards the staircase, intent on just one goal - her nice, comfy, soft, warm
bed, barely managing to remember that she'd left Mr Spitz in the Common
Room, on guard duty.

 Llama glove puppet tucked into the crook of her arm, the Fractured Knightie
gave into her fatigue, and started heading towards the staircase with her
eyes already closed, virtually sleepwalking across the hallway....

With disastrous results, as Kezia had been doing the rounds of the rest of
the lower floors to check everything was secure for the night, being equally
concientious about building security in wartime.  As she came out of the
library, the final room on her tour, she collided full-tilt with the sleepy
Squirette, and they crashed to the ground.

 "Ack!  Help!  We're under attacked!"  yelped the startled Knightie.

 "Aaaarrrggghhh!  My eye!  That stuff stings like, like, like.... garlic
juice?" The English CotKer's voice trailed off as she realised that Mr Spitz
had heroicly leapt to his mistress' defence (Yeah, right...) and she'd been
> sprayed with his patented extra-strong garlic juice.  Kezia frantically
glanced down at her beloved royal purple velour, and wailed loud enough to
bring the rest of the exhausted CotKers back downstairs again.

 "My dress!  My jacket!  My favourite - my extra, very favourite, party
outfit is ruined!  You, you, you.... stuffed toy, you!"  she shrieked,
waving a clenched fist under the offending glove puppet's face, and trying
desperately to keep her language repeatable.  "You rotten pythagorean
theorum!  You nasty little isoscelean triangle, you!"

 (Quite some years ago - and no, it's no business of yours just how many
years ago! - Kezia had read a historical novel where one of the characters
would use mathematical terms as insults, on the grounds that if you don't
know what they're calling you, it must be bad - and nobody likes to admit
they don't understand the exact nature of the insult just offered to
them...)

 Kyer, by this time, had sorted herself out, and stood in awe at the nature
of the insults.  Compare her beloved Mr Spitz to some math formula?  The
sheer audacity of it!  How did Kez know that her beloved Incas and Mayans
were master mathematicians, and that such terms were music to a llama's
ears?

 Pausing only for a deep breath, Kezia changed the target of her abuse.  "As
for you, you.... *Knightie*!  Kindly keep that vicious beast of yours under
control!"

 "Yeah, I'm a Knightie, darn tootin' right, I am!  And more than a little
bit
proud of that fact, too! - *Cousin*!" she shot back.

 Kezia  was about to reply when Jenieve interrupted. "Knock it off, you two,
it was an accident!  And with a war brewing, the last thing we need is to be
fighting among ourselves.  C'mon, into the Common Room, both of you, and
tell me what the banner says..."

 The angry pair gazed up at the banner, with it's two crossed swords, one
Crusader and one Roman, and read aloud their faction's motto: "Even when
they are trying to kill you, they are still family"....

 Kyer sniffed, visibly moved by the reminder that this was the heart of what
the Cousins of the Knight was all about - the relationship between Nicholas
de Brabant Knight and his vampiric father, Lucien LaCroix.  Kezia considered
the banner thoughtfully for several minutes without saying a word.

 "Friends?" asked Nicole, cautiously, still somewhat bemused by everything
still as this was her first war, she only arrived a few hours ago and here
were two of her new 'family' warming up for a 'pistols at dawn' routine.

"Friends!" replied Kyer and Kez - more or less in unison.  "But that llama
 has still ruined my favourite outfit!" added Kez, glaring over at the wooly
fiend - ie, Mr Spitz.

 "Guess that it's my fault for walking along the corridor with my eyes
 closed," admitted Kyer.  "Tell you what, tomorrow morning I'll call the
 Shrine - the Nunkies have this great range of cleaning materials - and I'll
 see what they stock in the way of anti-garlic velour cleaner, okay?"

 Kezia paused before replying.  The Fractured One was walking around with
her eyes closed?  (Not that that surprised her in the least bit.)  What
would her beloved Uncle want her to do?  (Quit this group and join the real
Cousins straight away, the little voice in her head replied.)  Honour
demanded otherwise - she'd promised to play with the CotK for this war, and
play with them she would....  And would that little voice please shut up and
let her get on with the plot? It was after 3.00am, for cryin' out loud!

 "Okay, you get the stains - and the stink - out of the dress and jacket,
and
we'll call the matter closed," she replied, offering both her hand and her
best LaCroixian smile to her leader.

 (to be continued in "Fight Crime: Shoot Back!")